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Bert Kreischer’s dream of a buddy comedy

By Peter Lindblad

So, here’s the elevator pitch for Bert Kreischer’s next movie. Let’s get a writer to work on a script that’s reminiscent of “Stripes” or the original “Ghostbusters.” Casting will be easy.

Bert Kreischer’s already got that part figured out. It’ll be him and fellow comedian Tom Segura, the two co-hosts of the wildly popular podcast “2 Bears, 1 Cave,” in the lead roles. The rest of the film will take care of itself.

Having wrapped up filming the upcoming comedy “The Machine,” the title taken from one of his most famous bits, Kreischer is ready for more movie work in the future, including a certain project with Segura down the road.

“We just finished a movie ‘The Machine,’” said Kreischer. “And my hopes and goals is that that goes in movie theatres worldwide, and that it’s received well, and then honestly, that I get the opportunity to make more movies because I had a really good time making ‘The Machine.’ And I want to work with Tom Segura, because he’s my best friend, and the guy that makes me laugh harder than anyone in the world, and growing up, I idolized what Bill Murray and Harold Ramis did, and Chevy Chase and John Belushi and Dan Ackroyd, and I would love to do a buddy comedy with Tom.”

Kreischer, who will be appearing at the Riverside Theatre in Milwaukee on Nov. 14, is willing to strike a bargain with the universe to make it happen.

“’The Machine’ comes out and we do a buddy movie with me and Tom, and then you don’t have to hear from me anymore,” said Kreischer, perhaps only half joking. “I won’t bother you guys. I won’t do standup. I’ll play select theatres every now and then. I’m coming to Milwaukee once every two years. I won’t ask you to come every year. I’ll do the oldies.  I’ll tell whatever old stories you want to hear.  Just let me get that buddy comedy with Tom.”

Those familiar with Kreischer’s standup performances know that “The Machine” is the story of how Kreischer became involved with the Russian mob during a student exchange experience in college. He told it on Joe Rogan’s podcast, and it was Rogan who encouraged Kreischer to tell his crazy stories onstage. In a recent interview with Out & About Wisconsin, Kreischer explained how that was a turning point in his comedic career.

Over the years, Kreischer has transformed as a comic in other ways, too. He’s more willing to be completely open, and not just by unbuttoning his shirt – he’s famous for performing shirtless, after all.

“I would say I don’t think you’re a good comic until you’re 40,” said Kreischer. “I think the older I got, the more comfortable I got with who I was, the more comfortable in my life I felt like I became. I got more comfortable talking about my family. When I was young, I was never comfortable … I would never tell people I was in love, and now I talk about my wife, my kids. I have a story now that I’m telling about having to put down our dog that is fairly emotional, and I never would have had the balls to do that when I was a kid. Never. I also think you get better at what you do, so now I can wrap up an arc quicker. I can recognize a callback … what I do is, when you tell a story, you plant a little seed up front, and then you harvest it at the end of the story, and I can recognize all these things a little quicker now, so I can get a story up and running faster.”

Now, let’s get to work on that buddy comedy.

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